He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
we're so committed to being not committed
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
