I am puke
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
