I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
