Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
