I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
