I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize