8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
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