Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
time to smoke my breakfast
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Randomize
