Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
When are your genitals available?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
