I bet he comes in French.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize