I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
