We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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