OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
