We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Randomize
