What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
