it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Randomize
