Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize
