Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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