I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
