She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
