Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
