I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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