did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Randomize
