Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
did you just send me my own nude
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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