Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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