this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
