i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize
