my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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