you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
