I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Randomize
