I want to walk on stilts...naked
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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