Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
