if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
