it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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