She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
