I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
