Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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