so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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