I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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