what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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