Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
We're too hungover to prance.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
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