I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
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