This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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