You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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