Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
