I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
