Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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