Michael Bay diarrhea
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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