so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Cover your peen. We're going out.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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