Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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